CHAPTER 12 - Black Magic and Its Exposure
The Variety Theatre opens its intermission with a comic cycling act involving a tiny man in a hole‑filled yellow bowler, a plump blonde on a single‑wheel pole, and an eerie eight‑year‑old on a tiny two‑wheeler. The act ends with a spectacular stop at the orchestra pit, earning applause. In the backstage office, financial director Grigory Danilovich Rimsky sits alone, troubled by the mysterious disappearance of Varenukha and by the sudden failure of all telephones. At the same moment a messenger announces the arrival of a foreign artiste. The door opens to reveal the magician Monsieur Woland, dressed in a long tailcoat and black half‑mask, accompanied by his long‑checkered assistant (later identified as Koroviev) and a giant black cat (Behemoth) who walks upright. The assistant immediately produces Rimsky’s gold watch from the cat’s ear, shocking the director, while Behemoth performs a flawless trick of drinking water from a carafe with its paw.
The master of ceremonies, Georges Bengalsky, introduces Woland and his seance, claiming it will prove there are no miracles. Woland summons an armchair onto the stage and begins a dialogue with Koroviev about Moscow’s outward changes. After a brief banter, Woland orders a simple trick. Koroviev snaps his fingers, produces a deck of cards that the cat swallows card‑by‑card, then throws the deck into the audience. The audience discovers the cards in a patron’s wallet and is offered them as souvenirs. Suddenly, a rain of genuine banknotes falls from the ceiling, filling the theatre with money. The crowd frenzy is halted when Koroviev blows the rain away.
Bengalsky attempts to denounce the spectacle as “mass hypnosis,” but his speech is drowned out. In a sudden escalation, Koroviev commands Behemoth to attack. The cat lunges at Bengalsky, mauls his neck, and tears off his head, causing a roar of horror. The head is presented to the audience; after a brief dialogue, the cat gently reattaches it, erasing all blood and damage. The bewildered Bengalsky is escorted offstage, collapsing and demanding his head back. He is taken away in a medical emergency.
With the master of ceremonies gone, Woland vanishes with his armchair, unnoticed by the audience. Koroviev then transforms the stage into a lavish Parisian ladies’ shop: mirrors, carpets, and endless displays of dresses, shoes, handbags, and perfumes appear. A red‑haired girl in a black evening dress sings the names of French fashion houses. The audience, now in a consumer frenzy, tries on shoes and dresses, while Behemoth serves as a doorman and assists with fittings. A brunette patron finally models a new dress onstage, prompting cheers.
Amid the commercial chaos, a baritone voice from box 2—identified as Arkady Apollonovich Sempleyarov, chairman of the Acoustics Commission—demands that Woland expose the technique of his tricks, especially the money‑rain, and that Bengalsky return to the stage. Sempleyarov’s wife and his young relative (a debutante from Saratov) sit with him. When Sempleyarov asks about his whereabouts the previous night, the young relative bursts into cruel laughter and strikes Sempleyarov on the head with a violet umbrella, twice, while his wife protests. Police are called, but the cat intervenes, declaring the seance over and prompting the orchestra to play a bizarre march. The theatre descends into pandemonium: patrons storm the stage, the cat and Koroviev vanish along with Woland’s armchair, and the scene ends in a complete collapse of order.