CHAPTER 5 - There were Doings at Griboedov’s
The chapter opens with a detailed description of the two‑storeyed “House of Griboedov”, now the headquarters of the literary collective Massolit. The ground floor houses the city’s most renowned restaurant, while the upper floor contains a cluttered maze of rooms labelled for various Massolit sections. At midnight, twelve writers and editors gather in the only lit room, awaiting the absent Mikhail Alexandrovich Berlioz, unaware that he has just been decapitated and mutilated on a tram. Their impatience grows as they wait, argue about dachas, and finally realize Berlioz cannot be reached by telephone.
A forensic team and Professor W. examine Berlioz’s corpse in a separate, brightly lit morgue room, while Zheldybin, Berlioz’s assistant, is summoned from the morgue to the office upstairs. The writers debate how to handle the body—whether to reattach the head or dress the corpse for a public display in the hall.
At exactly midnight the restaurant below erupts into a wild jazz dance, but the revelry is shattered when a faint light approaches the veranda and a white ghost walks through the fence. The ghost is revealed to be Ivan Nikolaevich Homeless, barefoot in a torn Tolstoy blouse, clutching a lit wedding candle and a paper icon. He shouts “Hail, friends!” and loudly proclaims that a foreign consultant (the mysterious Professor W.) killed Berlioz. Ivan frantically lists possible surnames beginning with “W”, demands police action, and describes accompanying figures: a checkered‑trousers man, a cracked pince‑nez, and a black cat. The crowd reacts with fear, confusion, and shouting; some attempt to calm him while others brandish weapons. The doorman, bewildered, refuses to intervene.
The scene descends into chaos: dishes crash, women scream, waiters try to bind Ivan with napkins, and a pirate‑like commander orders the doorman to sound a whistle and summon police. Ivan’s candle goes out, his candle‑lit face is smeared with wax, and a violent struggle ensues, culminating in a truck hauling away Ivan, the police officer Pantelei, and the doorman Riukhin as the crowd watches in stunned silence.